So this blog has a bit of a strange name. It's named after my favorite poem, "anyone lived in a pretty how town", by ee cummings. (It's at the bottom of this page if you want to read it). Except that title was already taken by someone who wrote one 2-sentence post in 2008. So that wasn't an option. So I decided on sleep wake hope and then. I don't really know why*. It was a nice sounding line and a lot of the other ones were taken. I did that a while ago, while the goal of my blog was still to be a food blog, although even when that was the goal it was still a bit confused (eventually, my food blog dreams were stalled by the realization that I should probably take PICTURES of the food, and also by the end of break and the resultant move back to a kitchen-less dorm room).
Anyway, about the poem. I hated and hated and hated ee cummings for YEARS because of his improper capitalization and grammar. And then in senior year AP English, it was explained to me somehow in a way that I finally understood. And I learned to just look at the way the words looked when you heard them and the lovely sounds and not read them directly and literally. And then I loved it. Once I stopped looking at words as words and started looking at them as something else which I don't really have a name for, I really liked this poem. (Also it is just so fun to say). (Also, it was explained to me that anyone and noone are names to replace people and I realized that just because you don't follow the rules doesn't mean something is bad).
And then all of a sudden I loved it.
And I think the title makes sense with my life now, in a couple of ways.
One is not very exciting. I just write a lot of the posts when I wake up in the middle of the night.
And because just because you are different and don't follow the normal rules, doesn't mean you are bad.
And maybe I could write a long extended metaphor where sleep is before I thought about autism, wake is when I figured it out, and then hope and then is all the good things that will happen after. But that sounds rather mushy and sentimental, so I shan't actually say it (just sneakily suggest it here).
~~~~
anyone lived in a pretty how town
ee cummings
anyone lived in a pretty how town
(with up so floating many bells down)
spring summer autumn winter
he sang his didn't he danced his did
Women and men(both little and small)
cared for anyone not at all
they sowed their isn't they reaped their same
sun moon stars rain
children guessed(but only a few
and down they forgot as up they grew
autumn winter spring summer)
that noone loved him more by more
when by now and tree by leaf
she laughed his joy she cried his grief
bird by snow and stir by still
anyone's any was all to her
someones married their everyones
laughed their cryings and did their dance
(sleep wake hope and then)they
said their nevers they slept their dream
stars rain sun moon
(and only the snow can begin to explain
how children are apt to forget to remember
with up so floating many bells down)
one day anyone died i guess
(and noone stooped to kiss his face)
busy folk buried them side by side
little by little and was by was
all by all and deep by deep
and more by more they dream their sleep
noone and anyone earth by april
wish by spirit and if by yes.
Women and men(both dong and ding)
summer autumn winter spring
reaped their sowing and went their came
sun moon stars rain
~~~~~~~~~
*I suppose it would be a better story if I skipped this part, but that's NOT HOW IT HAPPENED, so I will stick it in anyway, because I like to be factual and complete when possible.
Labels: autism, autistic?, food, me, Random, this blog