I've tried on various different times to start blogs (as you may be able to see from the few random older posts that exist). I started one to document various books I've read. I've tried once or twice to be a food blogger, although I never really was able to keep it up for more than a post or two. (For food blogging, I think it is also expected to take pictures of the food as well as write about it and make it, and the camera step was often what never really happened.) Each of these were really just passing phases. But lately, I've really wanted to start up again.
I wanted to start a blog but then I realized it was just because I wanted to talk to you. To you amazing people I found one day on the Internet who have words that perfectly explain me. Things that I couldn't find the words to explain properly but needed to be said.
It started with The Third Glance.* That is my life. Never before have I read something and been so thoroughly shocked that that was exactly like me. It explained all the things I've tried and failed so many times to explain. And explained it all so eloquently. So I read it all. Every single last post. (Because that is how I do things).
And then I looked some more and found others.** Amazing, wonderful people who think the exact same way as I do. (Well, probably not exactly, but in such surprisingly similar ways). I'd been thinking really through all of college that I might have a maybe-not-quite-the-same-brain/way-of-thinking as other people, but the number of people I had talked to about this was essentially non-existent. And then I found these people and this community and I got a name for me.
So now I am not sure how to proceed. The privacy-centered part of me does not really like the idea of my own blog. It seems very public and really, somewhat stressful, to remember to write things all the time. But I want to talk to you, to see if you really do actually think like me, to find other people just like me. Because I didn't realize this was possible until I saw this.
So I think I am going to try again. I am going to start up writing and see if anyone hears or reads or writes a response back to me eventually. And it may take a while and posts and posts about myself. And it may not end up happening at all. And that would be ok (although disappointing). But I am still going to try and see how things work.
So if you are one of the 4 people who have thus far managed to stumble upon this blog and you are waiting again to read it, (which I admit is unlikely), hello! I'm (hopefully) back.
*(I'm not sure how exactly I found it but I did and it is amazing).
**(I managed to read every single one of Alyssa's posts while traveling through Europe with very rare amounts of internet).
Labels: autism, me, my brain